Carol RoundChristian Living

Is Your Tongue “Holey?”

Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips”—Psalm 141:3 (NIV).

A friend and I were recently discussing the different times in our lives when we wished we’d just kept our mouths shut. We’ve all been there, saying the wrong thing at the wrong moment. Some of us have even earned a t-shirt for “foot-in-mouth” disease.

After we had a lively talk about some of those embarrassing and hurtful moments, my friend told me about a pastor’s wife she knew who had trouble keeping her mouth shut. I found the story amusing because the wife revealed she had “a holey tongue.”

My friend explained that since this woman knew she had trouble holding her tongue or refraining from speaking her mind, she had resorted to biting it to keep from saying things she should not. Therefore, she had come up with the expression, “holey tongue.”

I like this woman’s attitude because I have had to learn, the hard way, to keep my mouth shut when I thought I had all the answers. Like David, I must ask God continually to keep a guard over my mouth.

Author Robert Newton Peck once said, “Never miss a chance to keep your mouth shut.”

Following that advice is not always easy, especially when someone has made an unkind remark or passed judgment. It takes self-control and a whole lot of Jesus to hold my tongue.

When we hold our tongue, instead of striking back, we take another step in the spiritual growth process. Will we always win that battle? No, but in our striving, we admit we have a problem that needs to be addressed.

Psalm 52:4 describes the tongue as a “sharpened razor.” If you’ve ever been cut with a sharp razor or knife, you know the results. If the cut is deep enough, you bleed profusely.

The same thing happens when your words hurt someone’s feelings. Once the words leave the tongue, you can’t retrieve them. You can apologize and ask for forgiveness, but the words still hang in the air, coloring the relationship forever.

I remember the old rhyme, “Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”

I can also recall shouting those words when I was a child and involved with others in a neighborhood spat. The truth is words do hurt, not physically, but emotionally.

In Proverbs 12:18, wise King Solomon wrote, “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”

James 3:5 says, “So also the tongue is a small thing, but what enormous damage it can do.”

I’m glad God’s mercies are new each morning because I’ve been reckless with my words in the past. I don’t want to be remembered for those times when my tongue got the best of me. Instead, I want my words to be ones that encourage and lift people up.

As followers of Christ, we are a work-in-progress. He’s not finished with us yet. Therefore, I will keep trying with His help to harness my tongue and follow James’ advice in 1:19 “to be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger.”

I also plan to follow the advice of the pastor’s wife and develop a “holey” tongue.

What about you? Can you recall times you didn’t keep a guard over your mouth? Ask the Holy Spirit to help you develop a “holey” tongue.